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The Antelope

The Antelope

Accepting yourself in a society that invalidates your identity

LGBTQ pride flags


A quote from Glee character, Kurt Hummel, is a great example of the stereotypes that surround the bisexual community. Hummel said, “Bisexual is a term that gay guys in high school use when they wanna’ hold hands with girls and feel like a normal person for a change.” 

 Bi Visibility Day, celebrated on Sept. 23, brings awareness to stigmas like these and empowers the bisexual community.  

I spent my entire life convincing myself that I was straight. I knew I liked men, and that was good enough for me. I’m pretty sure, though, that straight people don’t have “am I gay quiz” in their Google search history. I had no issue with anyone else being gay, but it just wasn’t me.

Well, I was wrong.

Today, I identify as bisexual. This is something I’ve struggled to understand since the summer of 2020, when I considered the idea that I might be romantically interested in women. I questioned my identity a little bit more with so much time to think when the pandemic emerged. Tiktok became very popular at this time, and I saw a lot of videos focused on bisexuality. Finding a community online that shared my experiences and feelings opened me up to exploring who I am.

I had my first real crush on a girl in the fall of 2020. This was a new feeling for me, and it was honestly pretty overwhelming. I spent a lot of time wondering if all my crushes on men in the past were just fake. I thought that now that I’ve identified as bisexual, I would likely identify as lesbian in a couple years.

Exploring sexuality needs to be more accepted. 

For most of us in the community, we didn’t just wake up and think, “Well, I guess I’m gay.” Growing up in a society that idolizes straight relationships restricts young people from being open to exploration. Even after realizing that I was bisexual, it took me a significant amount of time to feel certain about my identity. If I hadn’t opened myself to bisexuality, I probably would’ve always followed the crowd, instead of finding myself through new experiences.   

Bisexuality is often invalidated, even within the LGBTQIA+ community. I’ve almost convinced myself so many times that I’m wrong in how I identify. Some believe that if a man identifies as bisexual, it is just a cover for him being gay. Being bisexual as a woman has become something that attracts straight men and is often just seen as something that girlfriends do for fun when they’re drunk.

Being bisexual is real, and it is valid. Don’t let anyone tell you that how you identify is wrong. The only person who truly knows you, is you.

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